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Published June 6, 2013

Just a short time ago, CFC Supreme Overlord The Mittani called for a State of the Goonion. He gave the following speech:

Welcome to our fellow Goons, our CFC coalition partners, our frenemies, our temporary allies of convenience, and even to our enemies - thank you for coming today. I’ll keep it brief.

My people, Odyssey has come - and it has left us destitute.

For the past few years our coalition has become accustomed to a lifestyle that is the envy of EVE. Due to technetium and sound fiscal management, we have been able to fund a peacetime reimbursement system, carrier giveaways, and galaxy-changing events like Burn Jita and the Ice Interdictions. But now that has all changed.

Odyssey has stripped the value of our regions. To compensate, other alliances have set up rental programs, something that we despise. Our finance team - the best in the game - tells me that in order for us to uphold our social programs, we must acquire more than fifty new R64s for the coalition.

We attempted to solve this problem diplomatically by killing Raiden in Querious, but we were rebuffed - in some diplomatic shenanigans best glossed over.

Wars in EVE - and in the real world - begin with a declaration of grievance, followed by a quest for justice. The enemy did a bad thing to us, and now we must go after them to redress the balance; they are bad people and need to be punished. White Noise DDOS’d our servers, so we took Branch. Raiden abused Titan blobs against our people, so we took Tenal. NCdot violated a treaty, so we took Tribute. So it goes.

Just as the aggressor claims a grievance against the defender and demonizes them, the defender inevitably claims that the reasons stated for the war are a lie, and that the motives for the war are a crass manipulation of politics. We are being attacked just for money, for space, for greed, say the defenders: the aggressors are lying shills. We have seen this drama played out for every war, on every EVE-O thread, on every Kugu thread.

Tonight we are invading Fountain. But we are not going to bother with stating a grievance or demonizing the defender - We are doing it because we need the region and its moons for our people and our friends.

TEST has abruptly found itself in an untenable position as a sovholding alliance - in its current space, at least. Odyssey has vastly enriched the Southwest, while simultaneously there have been a series of unfortunate errors which has alienated most of their former allies, many of whom are now actively attacking them.

From the northeast, NCdot is taking Querious. From the Northwest, the CFC is taking Fountain. From the southeast, the former HBC is now exploring assaults on Period Basis.

You may have read some political dramas on Kugutsumen involving TEST. You may have expected us to dig deep into these dramas, to point fingers, scold, or find offense. Yet the hard fact is that we would not be going to war against TEST if they were living in Providence.

What is happening now in the Southwest is a mass land grab motivated by economic pressure and diplomatic realignment: the owners of the richest space in the game have managed to politically isolate themselves and turn their strongest allies into enemies in a matter of weeks. Meanwhile, the Russian forces in the southeast are putting pressure on the former HBC to find new homes in the southwest.

Who is right and who is wrong doesn’t really matter: if we do not invade Fountain, someone else will - and they will enjoy the kind of wealth that we once had, while we wallow in wrenching poverty.

We are now about to send our fleets to the invasion zone. Before we do, some important details:

  • This is a CFC invasion, which means that we will be judging participation as a basis for spoils and moons will be distributed accordingly; Fountain will be held under GSF sov, but will be free-for-all mining and ratting for the entire CFC to enjoy.

  • Move as much as you can in your carriers; this will not be an easy war, so take two or three trips with your carrier if you have to.

  • We will not be using Alphafleet in this campaign. Do not bring Maelstroms or Rokhs to the invasion zone. Alphafleet will not be formed under any circumstances.

  • We are adding an armor Loki doctrine to our roster. If you want to be ahead of the curve, begin training for Lokis now. This means that the primary CFC doctrines will be Techfleet, Tengufleet, Fuckyoufleet, and Lokis.

  • We are considering adding Caracalfleet as an official doctrine for casual fleets, skirmish gangs, and for players interested in learning how to FC: it is powerful, is flown in the same style as a Tengufleet, yet durable and inexpensive.

  • Subcaps: Each CFC alliance will be forming an alliance-only fleet to move to the staging area for those of you who do not have carriers. Fleet up, get in an op channel on mumble, and get moving.

  • Mandatory doctrines for this campaign will be Tengufleet, Techfleet and Fuckyoufleet, but some CFC alliances will be bringing alliance-specific doctrines such as AHACs. Alphafleet WILL NOT be used, do not bring a Maelstrom under any circumstances.

  • There are ships available on contract in B-D if you cannot find enough ships in VFK. You are invited to help stock B-D if you wish to supply the invasion, on top of what already exists.

Now we go to war. There will be no Q&A session. Every node en route to the staging area has been reinforced to make way for our coming. Our goal is now to get the CFC staged and commence siegework as soon as possible.

Ops will continue into the late US timezone.

One final note: do not underestimate the defenders. This may be a long war, and we have grown soft from too much peace.

Thank you for coming tonight. Good luck to all of us, and I will see you in fleet.

Following the speech, CFC fleets made their way to Fountain to begin the invasion.

Alizabeth
On hiatus. On Twitter @AlizabethVea